Poetic Turns on Life

The Worst Decision

The reality is, I'm already attached.
Beyond my control are the feelings inside.
Grief, unworthiness, betrayal, helplessness.

A tiny life has cut us off at the knees without either of us knowing it.
An incessant voice screaming into the heady air.
A pinprick of doubt and hope battling against each other where I run.

Curiosity intermingling with my heartbeat and nerves throbbing.
Wondering why I have demanded something to be only black or white.

So why go on?
Let it be cut off at the knees.


Untitled

Here I am wishing I wasn't grasping blindly along
for something never there.

He's made a living dazzling and eluding
to the point that his crafted truth is my reality.

Rampant insecurity ravaging any hope I had
for secured love and soul mates.

I hate that it takes up my time and heart
so I can't escape from my own doubts and insecurities.


Rape

Why, as women, do we love that which has the ability to destroy everything we are?
We devote ourselves to following our desires to those who don't understand us.
We sacrifice our femininity and individuality
for just a glimpse of what our lives could be.
We pay penance waiting for a sign that will come to make us feel less foolish.
And in the end, we give ourselves up to the rape that we are subjected to by the men we love so much.

Undecided

I cannot figure if it is a yes or a no,
If it is an interest or a passing fancy,
Or if it even exists.
I pay attention, as always,
Feeling slighted at the slightest glance.
I cannot help it,
It is my nature.
I will forever be a jealous romantic.
Drowning my sorrows in the honey
Of a nectar of which is forbidden to me.
Why true love can never come to me, I will never know.
But this be it so,
Till my last breath.